OFWs & Infidelity : Gaano Nga Ba Kadalas Ang Minsan?

Kapag Palay na Lumapit sa Manok (When the Chicken Comes to the Rice Instead) (2011)

Oil (91x3.8x91 cm), Paul Hilario

People say that cheating is inevitable in relationships. Whether you're a few months in or been together for 6 years - when the itch comes, there comes a point where you just have to scratch.

Or as a Tagalog saying goes, "Mas madaling hulihin ang manok na nakatali. Wag ka nga lang magpapahuli sa may-ari." [It's easier to catch a chicken who is tied, just don't let the owner catch you]. 

With OFWs, away from families and prone to bouts of homesickness - we're more vulnerable. It's actually so known that it's part of the standard lecture for newcomers, never to trust a kabayan saying he/she's not committed at face value. In the age of Facebook and other social media platforms, you don't have any excuse to not do your homework. 

Before even thinking of starting a relationship, one must prove one's status through:

1. Be vetted by at least two (2) uninterested parties;

2. Be able to furnish an NSO certified CENOMAR (certificate of no marriage) or proof of annulment; 

3. Add you to their original social media accounts; and/or

4. Verify with your HR department (if colleague).

Char. Dami diba, but if you can prepare thoroughly for a PRC exam or any kind of test, why can't you do the same for your future partner in life?

Sabi nga ni Warren Buffet: 

"You want to associate with people who are kind of the person you'd like to be. You'll move in that direction. And the most important person by far in that respect is your spouse. I can't overemphasize how important that is.

Marry the right person. I'm serious about that. It will make more difference in your life."

However, all will be moot if you already know that the person you like/love/ in lust with is married. 

So why do we know it and still go through with it? 

Here are 10 possible reasons why:

1. 80% of the year we're away from our families. We're homesick, we're lonely and it's cold during the winter and hard during the holidays.

2. Disillusionment. Most OFWs are breadwinners, sending most of their salaries to their families back home. They see their partners squander their hard-earned money on luxuries while their kids don't do well in school or badly influenced by peers. You'd think won't it be easier to just start over.... with someone else?

3. Marital dynamics; when it's the women who earn more and 'toxic' Filipino machismo poisons the heart and mind. 

4. Proximity -  majority of OFWs live in shared accommodations to save on rent. It's a money-saving move but it's a cheating arrangement waiting to happen (if the heart is easily tempted).

5. The dating pool is limited for singles. Those you won't even dream of dating back home looks comely after some time while all the good -looking ones are either taken or gay. Bottomline is, it's every person for oneself - "matira ang matibay".

6. "Kapag palay na ang lumapit sa manok, bakit di pa tukain?"

7. Since we're all away from home, everybody becomes tolerant, accepting even, of these so-called "arrangements". Nobody tattles, because of well, "pakikisama";

8. Victims of infidelities or escaped from abusive partners;

9. Environment. If you're all in the same age at home, everyday's basically a party. If you don't choose the people you surround yourself with, temptations will surely pop up in every corner.

10. Falling out of love.

It's truly a big risk and not just for long-distance relationships. However, in all situations, you always have a choice. You have the choice to not open your heart up, nobody can tempt you if you believe in yourself, your family and the love and respect your have for your partner. All relationships require work, emotional and financial investment. And say you're crumbling under familial obligations, who's to say you're not just jumping from the frying pan and into the fire?

Being in a foreign land does not mean you have to lose your values and principles just to survive and adapt.

And if all else fails, just remember: adultery can get you deported and is punishable under Philippine law. You might not get caught right away but any partner with the right skills can turn into CID with the proper motivation.

But if you're still insisting that love trumps all despite knowing that your partner is married and has kids - well then good luck to ya, Because in the end if you get dumped, all you can do is just go on Facebook Live, sing your jeje heart out with hugot songs + Neneng B and spout religious nonsense while all your family and friends are bombarded with details of just how much of a homewrecker you are until EVERYBODY knows --- then it's only karmic justice.

Too specific? HEHEHEHE.

Homemade Palitaw with Toasted Sesame Seeds

Since we're grounded at home probably till mid-July, still not doing anything else other than:

1. learning how to cook
2. other chores
3. online study
4. work while I do everything else
5. reading webnovels [Current Fave: You're Beautiful When You Smile :) Drama probably coming out in Dec 2020!]

I don't go out unless it's for groceries because the heat and dust brings out my allergies -_-

So here I am again, chronicling my #wifey101 cooking journey as I learn more and more recipes. And of course more Filipino dishes :)

Palitaw is a Filipino dessert or kakanin ("kain" to eat and "kanin" rice). It was named as so because you'll know that it's cooked once it rises from the bottom of the pot ["litaw" to rise]. Pretty straightforward.

INGREDIENTS:

1/3 cup white sesame seeds
2 cups glutinous rice flour
1 cup water
1/2 cup granulated sugar
shredded coconut [portions as required]

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Toast your sesame seeds in medium heat until golden brown, then set aside.
2. In a bowl, mix your glutinous rice flour and water. Mix until desired dough consistency is achieved. Once done, knead with your hands to balance out the wet and dry parts of the dough.
3. Roll small sections of the dough into balls and flatten with your palm. Make sure that it's thin enough that once it rises, it's cooked all the way through.
4. Boil water in a pot. Once it's hot enough, put the dough in by batches.
5. Once cooked, cover each in shredded coconut on both sides.
6. Mix the toasted seeds with granulated sugar for the dip.

Serve and enjoy!
Missing Laiya! T_T

Calderetang Baboy with Sweet Potatoes

WFH life making me more domesticated.

Forced to learn more recipes if it means less takeout (and less sodium, grease and cholesterol inducing foods). Gained 3 KG since the quarantine started --- IIII kennnnatttt T_T

Looked up what caldereta means and it's:

Caldereta, in google translate from spanish meant stew

in Filipino, it was derived from the word caldera or cauldron or kaldero [vessel] where stews are cooked.

Caldereta or Kaldereta is generally a Filipino dish made of beef [or goat or pork], liver spread, bell peppers in a tomato based sauce. When I searched it on Youtube, they usually use tomato sauce or paste but with this recipe, I won't be using both.

INGREDIENTS:

2 carrots, diced
2 Vietnamese sweet potatoes, diced [looked like purple yams but it's really not]
1 yellow capsicum, strips
1 onion, sliced
1 garlic, minced
1 Mama Sita's Kaldereta mix (spicy)
1 Reno liver spread
Olive oil
pork, diced
2 tomatoes, diced
1 cup of water
1 beef cube

INSTRUCTIONS:

1. Fry diced carrots and sweet potatoes in olive oil for at least 10 minutes.
2. In another pot, saute onions and garlic for a few minutes then add the pork.
3. Add tomatoes, saute and cover. Add water and beef cube then let it cook until meat is tender.
4. Once meat is thoroughly cooked, add liver spread and kaldereta mix. Stir until everything is coated nicely.
5. Add the cooked carrots and sweet potatoes.
6. Add capsicum strips to sweeten the stew,
7. Let it cook for a few minutes more, then serve hot with rice.

No additional seasoning needed because of the spread and mix :) Mama Sita's you a lifesaver!

Have fun and enjoy the weekend!

Ginisang Munggo with Crab Balls

It's week 6 quarantine period here in AUH.

Sharing with you my favorite munggo [mung bean] recipe:

But first let's define what ginisa, or gisa means (at least you'll learn a little Tagalog/Filipino as well):

Gisa, maggisa or gisahin [verb] - to saute, to cook in oil, garlic, onions or tomatoes.

Yes I cook while I work because time management :P

Now, I'm really more of a guesstimate/beginner cook but the good thing is whatever I make, it's yummy for Mr. A :P charrrrrr HEHEHEHEEEEE

My recipe is quite simple and straightforward. I don't put a lot of ingredients in it because it's already tasty enough without any meat. Usually we cook it on a Friday and only once every 2 weeks as a precaution against high uric acid levels and crab meat not really a healthy option for Mr. A.

Below recipe is good for 2 if you would like it to last until the following day. Otherwise, you can serve for 4 in one meal.

INGREDIENTS:

2 cups mung beans
1/2 garlic
1 tomato, cut to cubes
1 onion
3 tbsp fish sauce
8 crab balls [frozen] - you can get this from any chinese Baqala or Mini Manila
1/2 tbsp ground black pepper
water


INSTRUCTIONS:

1. Place the mung beans in a pot with water, and bring to a boil [around 30-45 minutes].
2. You can check the beans from time to time, squashing it with your ladle once it gets softer.
3. Using another pan, saute the onions and garlic until brown.
4. Add the tomatoes and fish sauce and cook for at least 5 minutes.
5. Once the tomatoes are thoroughly cooked, transfer everything to the pot.
6. Add the crab balls and ground black pepper.
7. Stir and simmer for at least 10 minutes. Add fish sauce as per taste.
8. Best served hot with 1 cup of cooked rice [diet!]
9. Enjoy!

I only actually learned how to cook via Panlasang Pinoy's youtube account. When I left home I only knew how to cook spaghetti and rice but now I'm proud to say I can cook a little better HEHEHE

Well, baby steps :)

#StayatHome

When you have no right to get bored at home -_-

Been watching Chris Broad of Abroad in Japan to keep myself entertained... and motivated! Originally planning to go to Europe for our honeymoon but now we're planning on Japan, South Korea and Taiwan once COVID-19 has been properly put under control #thingsimlookingforwardto or #TIFT :)

Here's a snapshot of me for the char, day 5 WFH
Didn't hoard BTW, we only bought 2 weeks' worth which was the same as our usual grocery runs.

Hang in there guys and let's all pray for the safety of everybody on the frontlines. If you don't have the budget (like I do) to help out for the PPE drive, just staying at home means 1 less potential carrier off the streets.

Let's all do our part, be it small or big, to contain this pandemic.

Team Building in Longbeach Campground (Bin Majid)

At the end of January, our team headed to Ras Al Khaimah for our first ever overnight and legitimate team-building exercise. I say legitimate because usually our team building gigs were comprised of house parties, dinners or bowling tournaments but now we actually have a facilitator, a schedule and everything! Talk about serious LEVELING UP ^^ 

Since for most of us it will be the first time going to Ras Al Khaimah which was 2 hours away from Abu Dhabi, we had to carefully plan the logistics to and fro. And as it's not officially company funded - we had to take account everybody's current budget and meticulously canvas the various rent a car shops throughout Abu Dhabi just to get the best deals. So meticulous that I have to dedicate another post for this HEHEHE

Anyway, what sold us on the location was that it will not just be a team building activity, but a glamping one as well :) Glamping sooo fancyyy CHECKKKK!

Check-in time is the same as other hotels, 2PM, so our call time in AUH was at 9AM. We'll have enough time for breakfast, lunch and any other stops in between.

Entrance

The list of activities are endless!

Love the view from here

Messy view from inside

Our tents were conveniently stationed right in front of the dining area, near the washrooms and just in front of the BEACH. Wooo!

Adult swimming pool area/bar

The A Team

We stayed in the authentic deluxe tent which was good for 3 people. There's 1 king-sized and 1 single mattress and free toiletries included. Upon check-in we verified with reception the number of people who will be staying per tent so we can get towel cards per person. Half-board is included automatically as well, so you won't have to worry about breakfast and dinner :)

Movie night at Wakanda

However, since we were mature and ultimate professionals, we settled in to completing our Day 1 exercises while sneaking in glances towards the inviting beach and to everyone who were having fun around us HEHEHE :)

Kidding aside, we had a fantastic facilitator, Dr. Judith Bacarro, who is truly the most positive and encouraging person I have ever met. She's actually our manager's mother in law, and we were so lucky that she was currently on vacation so we were able to invite her.  Please click on the link above to know more about, as it's truly a blessing and an honor to be able to meet and learn from her.

Sharing

Team exercises

Interpretative dancing

Sunrise yoga was cancelled so we had our own yoga session courtesy of Tita Mel

Sunrise slash kiddie yoga

Proud to say we won!

I didn't really do anything, just stood around to shout YOURS everytime ^^

Hi Tita Judith!

The A Team with the manager and organizer

Group photo 2

Bonfire until midnight!

FUN FUN FUN!

Over-all it was such a positive and educational experience. As our numbers started to grow, (we began only with 3 people) the exercise helped us not just to appreciate each other's strengths and flaws but on how to use these qualities to bond our group closer for a better, more effective and self-reliant team.

Moreover, being in such a distant place also gave nobody a choice to go home or to get distracted with clingy significant others ^^ We were able to focus further on the tasks at hand, on each other, and the wonderful place we were in.

Sunset at Ras Al Khaimah

I'll leave you with this video, which sums up just how fun the experience was for us:

Ta!

Lately, I've been all for social media accounts that are positive, motivating and into the same advocacies that I'm into. I also started unfriending, or unfollowing people that only spouts nonsense or just stresses me out (even if they don't intend to ~ kasi hello, it's not all about me, char!) 
And it felt really good. The purging, I mean, The time I usually spent stressing out on some random friend's post about politics, love or humblebrag I now spend on listening to productivity podcasts. With my own accounts, I actually limit my own posts on FB, IG & twitter to occasional videos and stories when the mood hits me. 
As what Lana said, LIVE IN THE NOW. Stop flaking on your own family and friends and actually spend quality time with them, not for the sake of something to post. Unless it's for a fun event or a blog ~ besides, nobody reads this anyway *wink* *wink* 
Till next!