 |
| ctto |
The last time I felt this hopeless and stuck was 2010. I had no work then, no boyfriend, no direction in life. I felt adrift. All that ambition when I was young went nowhere. I always felt like I was incompetent, that I knew nothing.
Thinking back, I should've been more grateful because I still had my mom and my little brother. Maybe the same thing is happening now, that I should be grateful for my husband who's able to adjust to our life here. Me, I still can't let go of our life in UAE. Leaving our family and friends for a new life here in CA, was it worth it? I still can't wrap my head around it I guess. I was too excited about coming that I didn't even think about what kind of life we'll be leading here.
Anyway, I decided to make an online gratitude journal. Maybe this way I get some of my enthusiasm for life back. Exert more effort in living in the moment and not thoroughly strategizing our every step like there's no more time is becoming a real threat to my sanity.
